


I Almost Lost You

by destihellion



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-24
Updated: 2015-03-24
Packaged: 2018-03-19 08:36:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3603522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/destihellion/pseuds/destihellion
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"The <i>only</i> stupid thing there is about you is that fact that you’re <i>too damn stupid</i> to see how <i>good</i> you are"</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Almost Lost You

"I almost lost you," Castiel whispers, sliding his hand up to cup the side of Dean’s face that isn’t resting on the pillow.

Dean closes his eyes and brings his hand up to cover Cas' with his own, "I'm sorry."

Castiel shakes his head, “No, there’s nothing for you to be sorry about. Metatron-“

"All Metatron did was kill me, Cas," Dean sighs, opening his eyes to look at his angel, " _I_  got The Mark,  _I_  made the decision to pick up the blade, and  _I’m_ the one who was foolish enough to think I had it in me to beat him. That’s all me, man, and I’m sorry for being so goddamn stupid.”

Castiel smiles sadly at Dean, caressing the hunter’s cheek with his thumb. The eyes that look back at him are a vibrant green, not a hint of the black that used to occupy them in sight. This is  _his_  Dean, and  _his_  Dean comes packed full of self-deprecation. "Do you remember what I said to you, back when Gadreel was possessing Sam?”

"You mean when I  _let_  Gadreel possess Sam?” Dean laughs bitterly.

"Dean."

Dean rolls his eyes, “What, that I was stupid for the right reasons or something? Cas, there comes a point in time where stupid is just fucking stupid. Stop making excuses for me.”

Castiel’s nostrils flare and he moves his hand to grip the back of Dean’s neck, “You listen to me, Dean Winchester,” he demands, and Dean swallows, getting a tiny glimpse of the  _angel_  that lays beside him. “I _kn_ _ow_ you. I know  _every inch_  of you, down to your soul and the very atoms that make up who you are, and the  _only_ stupid thing there is about you is that fact that you’re too damn _stupid_  to see how  _good_  you are.”

Dean scoffs and rolls his eyes, “Cas-“

"I’m not done," Castiel says, shutting him up. He relaxes his grip on Dean’s neck and rubs his thumb back and forth. "You forget that I’ve held your very essence, Dean. I fought my way through the depths of hell along side my brothers and sisters to rescue  _your_ soul.   
"Throughout the battle, we all thought it worthless, laying siege to hell for one measly human soul. The others, even after we rescued you, continued to believe the same, but me?,” Castiel smiles at Dean, moving his hand from the man’s neck to run it through his hair, “The  _moment_  I touched your soul, I understood. It was pure. Even after  _ten years_  of torturing others, your soul was  _good_ , Dean. It was a beacon of light and hope even in the darkest pits of hell. I was more than proud to announce to every being, living or dead, that Dean Winchester, The Righteous Man, was saved.”

Castiel pauses to lean in and kiss the hunter. He pulls back just enough to speak, the tips of their noses touching. “So when you beat yourself up, coming to me with your self-hatred and telling me how  _stupid_  you are, you understand why I won’t believe you,” Castiel says, “I know you better than that.”

He waits for Dean to say something, but the man seems to be at a loss for words, staring at Castiel with a look of awe. Castiel bumps their noses together, “I’m finished talking now.”

Dean blinks and gives Castiel a small smile. He wraps an arm around the angel’s waist and gives a small tug, and the angel scoots as close as possible. Dean wraps himself up in Cas, tangling their legs together and burying his face in Cas’ neck. He lays still for a moment before tilting his head to speak. “I don’t deserve you,” he mumbles, lips brushing Castiel’s collar bone.

"You deserve the world," Castiel replies softly.

**Author's Note:**

> come visit me [here](http://dirtytrenchcoatsandwinchesters.tumblr.com/) on tumblr. i'm nice i swear.


End file.
